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Sex on fire

The alltime wish to say at loud: I want you! I love you! I desire you!
It runs through my skin so badly that it almoust scapes on its own, without a listener... yeap, there's none to hear it, but the wish to say it... just to say it. I would create images in my head, scenes of perfect compulsion, disruption of a day and a night. I kinnda miss the shadow that used to be around, jus the shadow -don't get it wrong. I don't want the words, nore the smile or the touch or the kiss that hurted to the very core after those eyes of fire and blade... No, I want the shadow back, the unholy shadow... The immortal picture of that someone that I could just yeld those words at. Haha... Sounds lonely, doesn't it?
"Sex on fire" just got me thinking about the feellings that I bury deep down for a while, it kinnda brougth them back, is here now... they're back now. I'm out there seeking for a connection, will I find it? Maybe I want to much... Maybe we all do.
Reality is just a social construct, the real deal is behind the doors, under the bed, inside the closet where the monsters are, where the shadows lay. Reality is a bitch, she bites and fights. I read a lot, a hear tons of music, I watch movies and tv, just to avoid her, because she can be hurtfull and I'm not ready to face her... Not tonight, tomorrow.
Yeah, I'm an idealist, a dreamer. What's wrong? Am I on the wrong side of the road? Am I supouse to live on the other edge? Should I be letting her tight me down to whatever she wants? Hell no! I'll never... She'll never... I will remain me for as long as I can give a fight, I will see her but I will not follow, because I can. Yeah, yeah, go on, analyze me. I'm broken, I'm insecure and crazy, and I don't give a deamn, for as long as I can do -create- my own version of her, I will. You should too.
Living outside is no good, there's chaos and controlled anarchy, there's killing and war, global warming, polution, injustice, stress, diseases, there's politics, bureaucracy, crime... There's a world about to fall apart, and we are just a bunch of witnesses. Can we do something? Tell me the truth, not another dream, not another ideal, not another speach... I want the truth, can I change anything? If I fight and I raise my voice, if I sign petions, if I march, would it change? Has it? Am I blind?
Sorry folkes, I'm staying here with my little dream and with the desire of that shadow to return so I can go outside and scream that name so loud... It might get other upset, but I don't mind, as long as I have a real reason to fight, as long as I find the way to change something around here, I will stand and yeld and scream, and kick, as hard as I can.
Léase bajo la influencia de los Kings of Leon: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=94RNp7veIJE
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Minimizando

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L...

Ayer, por un momento, por un vago instante de tormenta, sentí que te me ibas... creo que era mi culpa... Tal vez un egoísmo insatisfecho fue la causa, quizá sólo un ánimo letárgico que nació con las olas saladas que golpearon mi rostro. Creí que te perdía... me sentí morir. ¿No ves tú que eres la única vida plena que tengo? ¿No ves que contigo mi vacío inútil encuentra entretenimiento? ¡Mírame ahora! El mar que derraman mis ojos pesa en las piernas, se me doblan, he caído. Estoy convencida de que mis palabras hacen mella, hacen llaga, te atormentan... es suicidio. Las palabras se me han doblado entre sollosos y creo que he perdido la cordura, me duele el mundo sobre la espalda, me duelen tus ojos lluviosos y tus cabellos de noche a los que se les están cayendo estrellas. Ya no llores. No me cubras con oleadas de reproches líquidos, no me ahogues en el sísmico lamento de tu llanto. Ya no llores. ¿No ves que me matas? ¿No ves que ya no soporto? Anda, déjame absorberte en besos y caricias...
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Desire

Falling... the ocean swallows my heart, my brain, I think no more. I got lost in the sea. That's all.  Falling... deep. I feel the water in my launghs, the heavy burgain of the past running deep into my throught. I'm guessing is some sort of redemption, the killing of a shadow. No, I am not suicidal. I just want to eliminate the nasty feeling of that someone who's being watching me all this time. So... I got myself into the ocean, swalloed the water in an impulse for redemption... redemption. Cleansingnes -what I need. It is a crazy desire -I know, yet a strong desire. I must go for it. I must let myself go into the ocean, fall into the water, go deep... deeper... deeper. The water is cold, solid and so blue it almost feels black. My body is a mere mass of colapsing air. Nothing is left to be told, to apologise, to forget, 'cause everything if washed by the salt pushing it out of my skin. Heavyly, I fall. Once my feet had touched the bottom -rock bottom- I begin the jo...
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